Dear Work Computer
195 Little Albany Street
New Brunswick, NJ 08903-2681
Dear Work Computer,
I left you running all weekend to perform my experiments. I did the same with my computer at home. When I got to lab this morning, you had decided to stop working. You did not have any errors. You just decided to put your CPU usage at 0% and stop executing code. My home computer, running identical code, had all kinds of results to tell me about when I greeted it last night.
I regret to inform you that your behavior over the past weekend will result in disciplinary action. I am giving you a demerit. What does a demerit mean? Let’s put it this way, you do not want to receive three of those. Three demerits and you’ll receive a citation. Five citations and you’re looking at a violation. Four of those and you’ll receive a verbal warning. Keep it up, and you’re looking at a written warning. Two of those, that’ll land you in a world of hurt, in the form of a disciplinary review written up by me and placed on the desk of my immediate superior.
I want a results on my desk by the end of the day. If you fail to do so, you will receive a full disagilation.